


Retrospect

by cc tinslebee (Doitlikeagreaser)



Series: The Narrative [2]
Category: The Office (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Developing Relationship, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Honeymoon, It's an AU so it's going to be a bit ooc, M/M, Married Life, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Non-Canon Relationship, Parent-Child Relationship, Parenthood, Polyamory, Pregnancy (beginning), Romantic Friendship, Slight Inspiration from Hamilton's Dear Theodosia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:15:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23402824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Doitlikeagreaser/pseuds/cc%20tinslebee
Summary: (A follow up to my Helpless/Satisfied AU.)Jim and Pam were very much in a whirlwind filled with each other from the beginning of their relationship to the life as an officially married couple. When the sleepless nights of baby crying start taking a toll on the new parents, a friend steps in and helps them out, making Pam and Jim reevaluate their relationship with Ryan Howard
Relationships: Cecelia Halpert & Ryan Howard, Jim Halpert/Ryan Howard, Pam Beesly/Jim Halpert, Pam Beesly/Jim Halpert/Ryan Howard, Pam Beesly/Ryan Howard
Series: The Narrative [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1689106
Comments: 2
Kudos: 18





	Retrospect

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Cutie_Ratootie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cutie_Ratootie/gifts).



> Thank you for this absolutely wonderful idea, Cutie_Ratootie! I am so sorry this took so long to write, but I had a lot of fun doing this. I hope this lived up to your amazing idea; I don't know where I'd be when it comes to writing in this fandom without you!

Pam woke up feeling warm; the type of warmth you assume is reserved for works of fiction and not real life. The type that comes from waking up where the light hits you perfectly and you already feel the warmth of your lover beside you; that wakes you up contently rather than out of overwhelming heat.

Pam sat up in bed, white bed sheets covering her torso as she was careful not to disturb her sleeping husband.

_ Husband. _

She almost couldn’t believe it. The majority of her twenties had been spent watching as her friends all got married left and right. All of them with their successful careers, constantly asking her when it was going to be her turn. All while she was struggling to get a stable job and trying to save up her money so maybe, just maybe, she’d be able to go to art school.

Those friends all came and went from her life, aside from the occasional Christmas card or Facebook post. Everyone except for Ryan Howard, who she had become friends with while working for the Michael Scott Paper Company, meaning that he knew  _ exactly  _ what she was going through. That’s what Michael did, apparently; he gave outcasts with quarter-life crisis at place to call their own. 

But that was almost two years ago. Now, she had a stable job working for Dunder Mifflin as a saleswoman where she would get to work beside her lovely husband every day. It almost seemed too good to be true.

Pam looked over to the sleeping Jim, who was peaceful and radiant beside her. She clearly wasn’t the only one who looked stunning in the Puerto Rico morning light, because Jim was glowing. Eventually, the staring went on long enough that Jim actually woke up. His eyes were heavy with sleep, but his eyes still came alive with brightness courtesy of the sun.

“Were you watching me sleep, Beesly?” Jim mused with a sleepy grin.

“Maybe I was,” Pam replied coyly, laying on her side. “Can you blame me?”

She quickly pecked him on the lips and his grin widened. “Darn, you’re stealing all my thunder,” he joked. “I thought _I_ was going to be the one who would be staring at _you_ in amazement that I managed to get someone so wonderful as my wife.”

“There’s still time,” she assured him with a laugh.

Jim smiled fondly at her, looking the same way that he did when they first met at that party over a year prior. “You want to get some room service?”

“Sure,” Pam smiled softly.

They ate breakfast on the room’s patio, overlooking the beach as they talked and ate. Jim handed Pam her cup of coffee, who took it graciously.

“Thanks,” she leaned her elbows against the railing as she took a sip. “Mm! This is actually really good. Ryan would love this coffee.”   


“Yeah?” Jim smiled, taking a sip of his tea.

Pam nodded, “ _ Super  _ ‘exotic’ too; that seems right up his alley.”   


“Sure does,” Jim mused.

She looked down at her cup, “This is decaffeinated, right?”

“Of course,” Jim replied with a knowing smile.

“Thank god,” Pam sighed in relief, taking another sip. She moved one of her hands and placed it gently on her belly because, well,  _ that  _ was a thing too.

“How’s she doing?” Jim asked, covering his obvious grin by sipping his tea.

“So they’re a she now, huh?” Pam grinned.

Jim shrugged, “Call it father’s intuition.”

“I didn’t realize that was a thing,” Pam countered, jokingly.

Jim shrugged and took a piece of toast from the plate, “Who knows?”

“I’d say probably the doctors.”

Jim bit back a laugh, “Okay, that’s a fair point.”

Pam grinned triumphantly as she took a piece of toast herself, “They’re doing fine, for the record.” She added, “How do you think things are going in Scranton?”   


“Chaotically knowing them.”

Pam laughed, “True.”

After a moment, Jim added, “It was really nice of Ryan to offer to cover both of our calls while we’re away.”

“I think he just wanted an opportunity to finally get back into sales since he was bumped down,” Pam said, half-jokingly. Quickly adding, “He’s a really good salesman once he’s motivated to do something. I’d trust no one more to cover our calls while we’re on our honeymoon.”

Jim nodded, “Except Andy’s covering  _ my  _ calls, because he really needs this and he’s the only other salesman who’d take the job. What are the odds that I’m going to lose all of my clients by the end of the week?”   


“Andy’s not  _ that  _ bad and I’m sure Ryan would never let it get that far,” Pam assured him. She then sighed, “Stanley and Phyllis still don’t like me that much, do they?”

“Pam, it’s really nothing,” Jim said, now his turn to assure  _ her _ . “They’re still apprehensive about the Michael Scott Paper Company. It’s all just Dwight-Schrute-fueled propaganda; they feel threatened by you because you’re  _ good _ .”

“You really think so?”

“I know so,” Jim answered, gently cupping her cheek with his hand. “I know it, Michael knows it, and I’m sure that Ryan would testify to that too.”

Pam smiled softly, putting her hand over Jim’s and lightly kissing the side of it. “Thanks, Jim.”

“Anytime, Beesly,” Jim smiled. He then gestured out to the beach, “Hey, did you maybe want to go out for a walk on the beach?”

“I’d love to,” Pam replied, unable to help the smile that tugged at her lips.

* * *

“Welcome back,” Ryan greeted them, grinning as they walked into the office for the first time since the wedding. He pulled Pam in for a quick hug before he whispered to them both, “I’m going to head for the annex before Michael catches wind that you’re back. Good luck with that.”

Pam rolled her eyes. “Thanks, Ryan,” she said sarcastically, quickly adding. “Hey, we’ll see you at lunch?”   


Ryan nodded with a grin, “Sure thing.” He was about to take his leave when he turned around, “Man, it’s good to have you both back.”

When their lunch break rolled around, the newly wed Halperts found Ryan with his lunch at their usual table in the break room.

“No Kelly today?” Jim asked him as he sat down.

Ryan shook his head, “Nope, just us. She’s eating lunch with Erin.”

Jim nodded and opened up his own lunch. Pam reached into her pocket and pulled something out.

“Here,” she said, passing the package over to Ryan. “They had this  _ amazing  _ coffee down in Puerto Rico and I knew that you  _ had  _ to try it.”

Ryan took the small package, graciously, “Thanks, Pam. I can’t wait to try this.”

“There are my two coffee lovers,” Jim mused, sipping his water.

Pam and Ryan looked to one another and laughed.

“So how was Puerto Rico?” Ryan asked.

“It was amazing,” Pam answered, thinking back fondly. “It was so bright and colorful and lively.”   


Ryan nodded, interestedly.

“So, Ryan,” Jim inquired, half-jokingly, “How many clients did I lose while I was away?”   


“Only one thankfully, and not a huge client either,” Ryan chuckled. “I hope you don’t mind that I booted Andy off of your calls after that.”

“Not at all,” Jim encouraged him with a laugh, “Thank you for saving my clients.”

“No problem, Jim,” Ryan assured him. “Oh, and Pam; I was wondering if I could help cover for you once you’re away on maternity leave?”   


Pam lit up in surprise, “Really? You’d do that for me?”

Ryan smiled softly, “Of course. That’s what friends are for.”

“And you’re sure it’s not too much trouble?”

“Pam,” he reassured her, “It’s no trouble at all. I want to help you out as much as possible.”

“Oh, Ryan, thank you!” Pam exclaimed, making Ryan smile into his drink subconsciously.

Jim tapped Pam’s foot with his own. She looked to him in surprise before the two exchanged a questioning glance. Jim nodded to her and she did back.

“What’s, uh, going on there, Halperts?” Ryan mused, lifting an eyebrow in confusion.

Pam turned to Ryan again, “Jim and I wanted to ask you something.”

“Yeah?” Ryan said hesitantly.

“We wanted to know if you would be interested in being our child’s godfather,” Pam explained.

“Oh,” Ryan placed his drink down . “Really?”

Pam nodded surely.

He chuckled softly, “Better not let Michael hear you say that.”

“Don’t we know it,” Jim mused.

Pam brought the conversation back, “So…?”   


Ryan nodded his head in a shrug, “Yeah, sure. I’d love to.”

Pam clapped her hands excitedly, “Great!”

“There’s no one I’d trust more,” Jim beamed.

* * *

Cecelia Marie Halpert was born on the fourth of March that year. Jim was  _ ecstatic  _ that his ‘intuition’ was confirmed, but he knew that he would have loved him and Pam’s child just as much if it had been a boy. 

Upon Pam’s request, Ryan was quick to drive to the hospital after work to meet the newest Halpert and his soon-to-be goddaughter. When he opened the door to Pam’s hospital room, he was met with the beautiful sight of Pam and Jim cradling their newborn daughter, looking at her lovingly as parents should.

Eventually, Pam looked up and saw her friend at the door. “Come see her,” Pam insisted softly.

Ryan cautiously went to Pam’s side, marvelling at the baby in her arms. “You know, I’m not usually a kid person, but she is the cutest baby I have ever seen in my life,” he admitted, awestruck.

Pam giggled lightly. She gently handed Cecelia over to Jim, who gestured for Ryan to join him on the other side of the bed.

As she watched the two men who she considered to be her dearest friends marvel at the little human in their arms that  _ she _ created, fondly, Pam couldn’t help but distantly think for a moment. In the moments just a few hours ago where she was panicking over having this child, Pam realised just how  _ fast  _ her life was moving. Obviously in real time, all of these things were happening just at the pace that they should be, but Pam couldn’t help but think maybe she had been blinded by the engagement, pregnancy, and wedding all happening so quickly. What  _ exactly  _ she had been blinded to eluded her at the moment, but as she looked up again and saw them, Pam couldn’t help but feel at ease.

* * *

That ease doesn’t last long when you have a newborn child. 

Pam thought, with hindsight, that giving birth to an actual human being was a walk in the park compared to actually  _ raising _ a child.

Cecelia was a good kid and Pam loved her dearly, of course, but that didn’t make the nights where she’d wake them up in the middle of the night crying or the days she would cry as they struggled to figure out what exactly she wanted any easier. Cecelia had no other way to communicate her needs to her parents and they couldn’t fault her for that.

It got easier eventually, but the dynamic shift that occurred once Pam’s maternity leave ended caused yet another rift. Pam and Jim were both suddenly swamped with both work and their daughter; the sleepless nights began to add up and weigh on them both.

“I love my mother,” Pam said into her third cup of coffee, “But we can’t ask her to babysit Cece every time we’re away. Honestly, I don’t even think  _ I  _ can handle seeing her all of the time, especially when she’s nagging at me about what I’m doing wrong.”   


Jim nodded sympathetically, sipping his fourth tea of the day, “This is a stressful situation for all of us.”

Ryan took a bite of his sandwich, interested in the conversation, “I can watch her.”

“Oh no,” Pam started, “Ryan, we couldn’t possibly ask you to skip work to help us—”

“It’s fine, Pam, really,” Ryan assured. “I don’t technically have to be here all the time, so it wouldn’t be a problem.”

“Are you sure, Ry?” Jim asked, unsure himself.

Ryan nodded surely, “That’s what friends are for. And godfathers.”

Pam looked to Jim for answers, “I suppose that’s a good point…”

“It  _ has  _ been a bit since he’s last seen Cece,” Jim conceded.

Ryan smiled, “So will you  _ please  _ let me help you two out?”   


Jim shared another glance with Pam before he nodded, “Sure, Ry.”

“Thank you!” Ryan jested, returning to his sandwich in satisfaction.

“Thank  _ you _ , Ryan,” Pam corrected, relieved.

After a small dispute with Pam’s mother, the Halperts arranged for Ryan to take care of Cecilia on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and every other Friday, which he was more than happy to do. Helene Beesly, on the other hand, was less than pleased.

“I don’t understand why I can’t just take care of my granddaughter,” Helene remarked to Pam as she was leaving the Halpert home one day.

“ _ Mom _ , it’s just Ryan,” Pam said, knowing that was the real source of her mother’s issue. “He’s our friend  _ and  _ Cece’s godfather. He has every right to babysit her.”

“Doesn’t he have a job?” maintained Helene.

“ _ Yes _ , Mom,” Pam defended. “He works with us, but his job’s more flexible.”

Helene made a judgmental hum, “Whatever you say, dear.”

“Bye, Mom,” Pam said sternly, leading her mother out the door.

Contradictory to both Helene Beesly’s remarks and Ryan’s own claimed lack of skill with children, Ryan was  _ really  _ good with Cecelia. He seemed to memorise her schedule easily, taking care of her with ease and with as much enthusiasm as Jim had when he mastered the art of diaper wrapping. It really went to show that Ryan could be a good worker when he really wanted to be.

It wasn’t long before Jim and Pam grew accustomed to coming home to Ryan playing with Cecelia on the floor or lightly bouncing the baby as he burped her. Each time they came home unnoticed by him, Pam and Jim would watch their friend and their child with soft expressions until he finally took notice that they were home. It was almost as if he was a part of their domestic life.

Suddenly, the long nights of baby crying weren’t so bad anymore. Not only was Ryan’s help a huge comfort to the new parents, but Cecelia seemed to calm down a bit thanks to Ryan’s semi-regular presence.

“I don’t know how you do it, Ryan Howard,” Jim mused one day at lunch. “Cece’s been sleeping like a  _ rock  _ for the past month.”

“Well, I can’t take all of the credit,” Ryan replied humbly. “You two are amazing parents.”

“Yeah, but we’re not  _ that  _ great,” Pam added. “The second you started watching over Cece, she started behaving like an angel.”

“Okay, it took a lot longer than my first time to get her to calm down,” Ryan insisted.

“Still,” maintained Pam, “We don’t know what we would do without you.”

Ryan shrugged modestly, a smile creeping onto his face as he returned to his lunch.

* * *

A week or two later, Jim had tried to convince Pam to let him take her out on a date. She would always try to counter his advances with various excuses, most along the lines of  _ ‘Who would take care of Cece?’  _ and  _ ‘We have a work thing that night; we both know that there’s no way that Michael will let us leave.’ _

After a week of insistence, Jim finally managed to convince her one day.

“Come on, Pam, it’s just a little dinner,” Jim insisted. “It’ll be fun.”

Pam, still holding her stance, replied, “I’d love to Jim, but ―”

Jim waved his finger half-jokingly, “Not buts this time, Beesly. I already have the reservation.”

“But―” Pam looked at her husband before she looked to her friend―who was eating his sandwich peacefully―for help, “Ryan―”   


“―Has already promised to watch over Cece tonight,” Jim finished with a content grin. “Like I said, you’re not getting out of it this time.”

She looked to her friend again, almost hurt, “You sold me out?”

Ryan looked up from his sandwich, finally tuning into the conversation. “I’m sure it’ll be fun, Pam,” he assured her. “You guys haven’t been on a date in forever.”

“It hasn’t been  _ forever _ ,” Pam held.

“Oh, really?” Ryan eyed her suspiciously. “When was the last date you two went on then?”

“It was ―” Pam paused, suddenly unsure of herself.

“ _ Exactly _ ,” Ryan refuted pointedly, biting into his sandwich again.

“So it’s decided then,” Jim said brightly. “You and I are going on a date tonight, Beesly.”

Pam rolled her eyes in mock annoyance, “I can’t believe you two ganged up on me like that.”

“Sorry, Pam,” Ryan said sincerely, the sound muffled by his sandwich.

“It’s all right, Ry,” she told him, smiling slightly and he knew she was secretly happy that she would be able to have a night off with her husband.

Ryan arrived at the Halpert home around six thirty, which gave Jim and Pam just enough time to get to the restaurant at seven. When he got into the living room, Ryan was met with the excited, nonsensical baby babbles of Cecelia Halpert as she reached out for him from her place in her father’s arms. Jim handed her off to him with ease before disappearing into the bedroom. Cecelia continued to babble happily once Ryan started holding her.

“Okay, her formula is in the refrigerator door in case she gets hungry,” Pam rambled, “She may need to be burped around seven thirty, make sure she’s in bed by no later than ni―”

“Pam,” Ryan interjected with a reassuring smile, “I’ve done this, like, a hundred times, I know what I’m doing.”

Pam sighed in relief, “You’re right, you’re right. Sorry, Ryan, I’m just a little nervous…”

“Hey, it’s okay,” he reassured her. “Nerves are normal, right? Just have some fun.”

Pam nodded, “Thanks, Ryan. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

He smiled humbly, “Don’t mention it.”

Jim reemerged from the bedroom, “You ready to go, Pam?”

Pam nodded, suddenly confident again. Jim, upon taking notice of her confident energy. smiled softly at her.

“Let’s go then,” Jim grinned. He waved to Ryan, “Thanks again, Ry.”

“Anytime,” Ryan responded with a small smile.

Pam kissed the top of Cecelia’s head, “Be good for your Uncle Ryan, Cece,” she whispered softly. She smiled thankfully to Ryan and followed her husband out the door.

She got into the passenger's seat of their car before she turned to her husband, “So, where exactly are we going?”

Jim grinned knowingly, “You’ll see. It’s a really nice place ―” he cut himself off, almost in realization. “Oh, you don’t have your coat.”

Pam shrugged it off, “It’s fine.”   


“It’s okay, Pam, I’ll just run in and grab it, okay?” Jim insisted.

Pam laughed softly at her husband’s stubbornness, “Okay.”

Jim jogged back into their house, quickly setting his sights on the coat as soon as he walked through the door. As soon as he was about to leave, he heard Ryan talking from the other room. Curious, Jim decided to peek over the corner.

Ryan was by the couch where they had left him, cradling Cecelia in his arms. Likewise, the baby was still babbling nonsense that made every bit of sense to her as she attempted to hold Ryan’s face in her chubby baby hands. Ryan appeared mesmerized by the little one in his arms.

“You look just like them,” Ryan breathed in amazement. “It surprises me every time.”

Cecelia, unaware of his words, merely cooed in response.

Ryan hugged her softly, “What to say to you?” He let out a breath, “You really do have his eyes, huh? You know, I never really thought that domestic life was ever really going to be my style, Ceec, I’ll tell you that. But you, kid… whenever you smile with that baby grin of yours, it makes me think.”

Jim marveled at the sight in front of him, half out of surprise and half because the scene made him absolutely melt. He knew Ryan cared for Cecelia a lot, but Jim never actually recalled a moment where he saw Ryan handle her all by himself. It was usually all just the tail end of things that he saw, not what came before.

Ryan continued, unaware of this. “I swear to you, Ceec,” he said, brushing a piece of baby hair out of her face, “I’m going to be here for you. I only really had my mom growing up, but as long as your parents and I are around, we’re going to make things right for you. You’re gonna have a lot of love growing up, kid.”

Jim faintly heard Ryan sniffle and decided it was probably best to let him have his privacy. Sneaking out the way he came, Jim rejoined Pam in their car.

“Everything all right?” Pam asked as he shut the door.

Still a little dazed, Jim looked to his wife, “Yeah, everything’s good. Shall we go?”   
  
Pam smiled, “We shall.”

* * *

Jim was right; the restaurant  _ was  _ a really nice place. Though, most places where you had to have a reservation usually were really nice places, Pam supposed. 

The restaurant wasn’t nearly as busy as one would assume it would be on a Friday night. Pam and Jim were led to their table relatively soon, following the waiter up a small flight of stairs to an inclined table. A small band played soothing music on the lower level.

“This is… wow,” Pam breathed in surprise.

Jim seemed pleased with her amazement, “I know, right?”

Pam looked around from her seat, almost unsure if this was even real, “How were you able to manage  _ this _ ?”

“A good husband never reveals his secrets,” Jim said with a grin.

Pam looked at him pointedly, but he could tell that she was amused.

“Okay, okay,” Jim conceded, “Andy helped me choose the venue.”

Pam shook her head in amusement before hesitantly asking, “Are you sure we can afford this?”

“Don’t worry, we’re covered,” Jim assured her. “Andy owes me one.”

Pam laughed, “Jim Halpert, are you  _ blackmailing  _ Andy Bernard?”

Jim chuckled, “No, it’s just a thing that happened while I was at the Stamford branch; I decided to cash in on it now.”

Pam nodded, amused by the story as a new waiter approached their table. The young man filled both of their glasses of water before asking if they would like any other drinks and for their orders. 

Jim watched the waiter leave before he spoke up again. “It’s actually kind of funny,” he started, almost hesitant. “When I went back into the house to get your coat, I overheard Ryan talking to Cece about how he was always going to take care of her and how she was going to have a lot of love growing up.”   


Pam smiled, sipping her water, “I’m glad that we chose Ryan to be her godfather instead of that nice couple from the church then.”

“Yeah,” Jim agreed quietly. His expression softened as he continued, “He just seemed to really mean it, you know? He really cares about her, Pam. I don’t know, it’s just…” Jim trailed off, not really knowing what else he could say.

Pam’s eyes slowly brightened in realisation. “You’re in love with him,” Pam stated softly; it wasn’t a question or an accusation, just a statement.

“I ―” Jim stuttered, caught off guard, “No, Pam, I―”

“It’s okay,” she assured. “I know.”

“You know?” Jim repeated in disbelief.

“Well, I suspected,” Pam conceded. “There was something about the night we met that didn’t really add up. This explains a lot actually.”   


“It does?” Jim shook his head, “Pam, nothing happened, I swear.”

“I know,” she said again, good-naturedly. “Neither of you have it in you to hurt somebody like that.”

Jim nodded, his gaze drifting away unconsciously.   


“I think he feels the same way,” Pam recognised. “He has this  _ look  _ he gives people that he really cares about; I’ve seen it directed toward both you and Cece.”   


“Pam, I love  _ you  _ too,” Jim promised her, almost desperately.

She smiled, “I know. I love you too”

They were quiet for a while, until Jim mustered up the courage to add something else to the conversation,

“He loves you too, you know,” he told her shyly.

Pam’s face heated up, “I―I never said―”

“I know,” he told her, reassuringly. “But that look you were talking about, he gives it to you too. I knew it from the day I met you both.”   


“I… I never noticed,” Pam admitted truthfully.   


“Maybe it’s a little harder to observe these things when they’re directed toward you,” Jim volunteered, a small smile managing its way onto his face.

Clearly it was contagious because a smile crept its way onto Pam’s face as well, “Maybe.”

Another, more comfortable, silence fell upon them. It was Pam’s turn to break it this time.

“So… what are we going to do about this?” Pam asked, unsure herself. “It seems unfair to him to just… not talk to him, especially considering how involved he is in our lives.”

Jim nodded thoughtfully, “You’re right. It’s not fair to him.” Past Pam, a window caught Jim’s eye, reflecting their approaching waiter with their plates. He mused, “Shall we discuss it over dinner?”   


The waiter seemed to catch Pam’s eye as well because she smiled back at him, “Sure.”   


* * *

Cecelia was fast asleep on Ryan’s lap when he heard the front door unlock and the Halperts enter their home. 

Ryan shifted carefully, scooping the tired child into his arms as he stood up, “I am so sorry that I haven’t put her back into her crib yet,” he apologised. “It’s just she looked so peaceful and I would have hated for her to wake you both up in the middle of the night confused as to where she was ―”

Pam chuckled, “It’s okay, Ryan. Thank you for thinking of us.”

Ryan licked his lips nervously and nodded, “Of course. I’ll go put her back now.”

Pam nodded as Ryan carefully scurried off to Cecelia’s room. He brought her off to the crib, supporting her head and body as he lowered her. Ryan lightly caressed her head before he left the room. 

When he reentered the family room, Jim and Pam were sitting on one of the couches. Ryan went to grab his coat and wish the Halperts a good night when Pam stopped him.

“Ryan, could we talk to you for a moment?” Pam asked from the couch.

Ryan stopped in his tracks, looking from his coat to the Halperts like a deer in the headlights. Had he done something wrong? “Uh, yeah, sure,” he said instead, hesitantly, making his way over to the chair parallel to the couch. “What’s up?”

Jim and Pam looked to one another almost contemplating before returning their gaze to him.

“We were wondering…” Pam started cautiously, “If you would like to go out to dinner with us sometime.”

Ryan had to bite back a laugh. “Seriously?” he said, dumbfounded and almost amused. “But, uh, shouldn’t I be looking after Ceec while  _ you two  _ are at dinner? That’s kind of why I’m here.”

“We just wanted to repay for all that you’ve done for us and Cece,” Jim said.

Ryan’s heart began to beat a little too loudly. This had to be some sort of joke, right? Then again, he knew Jim and Pam too well to know that they’d never mess with him―or anyone for that matter―like that. He took a breath, trying to keep his anxiety at bay, before standing up and saying quietly, “I should go."

“Wait, Ryan,” Pam said softly, sitting up a little. “Please don’t go.”

Ryan looked at her. She looked a little worried, but he could tell that she had something more to say, so he nodded and sat down. “Alright, I’m listening.”

Pam looked to her husband in affirmation one more time. Jim nodded, holding her hand gently as she turned to face Ryan again.

She took a careful breath. “Ryan, we both like you a lot,” she confessed. “We have for a long time. The night you and I met Jim, I was so awestruck that I barely knew what I was doing. And then you left to distract Michael, which I really appreciated; I just couldn’t help but feel as though you were pushing yourself away from us. Jim and I have been in such a whirlwind filled with each other the past year and a half that we didn’t realize that we were keeping you in the backseat; you were always here for us, but we never realized it.”

“We were very much blindsided during our honeymoon phase,” Jim added softly. “The engagement, the pregnancy, and the wedding; they all happened so quickly to us that we never really stopped to think what we were doing. Or how it could have hurt you.”

Ryan blinked, unable to really look either of them in the eye. His face was blank as he tried to make sense of what had been said.

Pam and Jim looked to him and then to each other, panicked. Pam’s mind raced with worry;  _ had they been wrong about Ryan liking them in that way all along? What if they had messed up this wonderful friendship that they had with him?  _ Pam opened her mouth as if to say something, but nothing came out.

Jim, upon noticing his wife’s speechlessness, said the only thing he could think to say. “Please say something, Ry,” he begged softly, giving Pam’s hand a comforting squeeze.

When Ryan looked up, his blue eyes were glistening with budding tears. His expression was filled with a mix of confusion and amazement it seemed. “I had given up the idea that either of you could possibly love me,” he admitted breathlessly. “I decided I could settle into just being a friend of the two people I loved most, figuring at least then I could keep you both in my life,” Ryan let out a sad little laugh. His face fell again, “That’s why I love being around Ceec so much; she’s the result of my two favorite people loving each other very much. I had no idea that you two could possibly watch me with the same affection I watched you with.”   


Pam smiled, her eyes brimming with tears as well, “We do, Ry. We always have.”

Jim sniffled lightly, trying his best to keep it together for Ryan and Pam. He used his free hand to gesture for Ryan to join them on the couch, pulling him into a hug. Jim held Ryan and Pam as they wept happily together.

It wasn’t long after that Ryan became a part of their domestic life in a different way. After moving out of his mother’s house, Ryan began to live with the Halperts in their home where he continued to care for Cecelia. While Pam's mother seemed shocked by this ‘sudden’ arrangement, Pam decided that Helene Beesly didn’t need to know the specifics regarding Ryan’s stay. Mrs. Howard, on the other hand, was more than welcome to visit her son and Cecelia (who she quickly began to adore). Jim and Pam, who had never really met Ryan’s mother until recently, quickly found that she was an incredibly sweet lady and they were more than happy to have her visit their home.

Ryan, on the other hand, had never felt happier in his life. He was quick to find out that at night, Jim and Pam were ones for cuddling. He didn’t mind much; it was nice to feel supported and trusted like that. On the nights where Ryan was held close by them in the middle of the bed, he would think with warming retrospect how completely at home and loved he felt in that moment. 

He wouldn’t trade that feeling for the world.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! If you liked this, please leave a kudos! Comments are much appreciated as long as they constructive/positive. This is all just for fun, so if you're not into this pairing, that's okay! Just please don't harass me or anyone else for it.


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